Redbox’s $1 rentals reminds me of the old dollar cinemas in Houston (certain to make a comeback, in this economy), and last night I scored Steve Carell’s Get Smart—scored, because it’s becoming increasingly difficult to time the returns of new releases as people catch on—which worked better, I think, when he wasn’t reciting Don Adams’ lines. Terence Stamp is fucking awesome, but he’s no “everybody hands up!” Siegfried. And Patrick Warburton’s Hymie is just plain wrong.
Brendan Fraser’s Journey to the Center of the Earth didn’t even have me bothering to compare it to the 50’s classic, wondering rather if this (and Made of Honor, which is sort of a remake, too, and an awful one, of Julia Roberts’ My Best Friend’s Wedding) would be the last movie I’d see before Bell went all nagra3.
But the worst of the lot? Steven Spielberg and Wil Smith for OldBoy. Oh, hell no. Please, take Captain America instead. I wonder if this news was the reason Chris sent me that text message earlier today about wanting to kill everyone? If so, let me join you.
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